First Snow
by Fearless Pursuit
Summary: She always gives herself one day. A few hours to remember the good times. Remember the happy times, before the weight if grief takes over. The morning after the first real snowfall she gets up early, bundles up and goes out. A winter AU.


_I don't own Castle or the characters. I'm basically playing paper dolls with someone else's dolls and sometimes their paper._

 _A winter AU_

She always gives herself one day. A few hours to remember the good times. Remember the happy times, before the weight of grief takes over. The morning after the first real snowfall she gets up early, bundles up and goes out.

She walks the park letting the cold freeze her nose and rosy her cheeks. It's early morning as she makes her way through the park. Remembering walking with her mom, going ice skating, looking at the tree in Bryant Park and the window displays at department stores.

She finds a swing, dusts it off and sits, just breathing. The cold, frozen air going deep into her lungs. She listens as the world around her slowly starts to wake up. The silence the snow brings a contrast to the normally busy, noisy city.

By the afternoon she knows kids will have come through this area, broken the fresh snow, made snowmen, had snowball fights, turning the pure white fluff into brown slush. The snow isn't very deep yet, just deep enough to cover the earth. Deep enough to allow her to remember. Thos year will be seven years since her mother was murdered and she knows the routine by now. How the depression will set in, how the twinkling light will make the pain in her chest ache with every flash. How by January 9th she will feel completely hollow and empty inside. Angry that no matter how hard she tries she can't find the justice she seeks. No matter how many victims she brings closure to, she's not any closer to that closure herself than she was on that night all those years ago. But for now, for these few moments, she's happy.

She remembers the good times. She enjoys thinking about how much her mother loved the fresh snow, and how she was always so excited for the holidays. 'It's a time for joy Katie. A time to be thankful for what we've been given and help those that haven't been as lucky as we have' Johanna would tell her. They'd adopt angels from trees and elderly in nursing homes. Always giving so much every year. Spreading her mother's joy and happiness as far as they could. So today, right now, as she sits on a swing in a quiet park in the early hours of the morning, and she remembers her mother. She allows happy tears to slip down her cheeks, happy to have the memories she has. The bittersweet feeling that while she knows she's lucky to have these, they will be all she ever has. All she ever remembers of her mother.

His daughter is gone for another few days, out on the west coast spending some time with her mother. She had left the morning after she got out of school for Christmas break and won't be back until two days before Christmas. She calls every night, but it's not the same as having her home. This is the first time she's missed the first snow. He wakes in the predawn hours, the loft unusually quiet and sees the snow falling. Every other year he's woken Alexis and they've bundled and up walked down to the park and played in the fresh snow. Throwing little snowballs and making armies of tiny snowmen. They played until they were soaked and went to warm up with pancakes and hot chocolate. How she loves to make a fort in the living room and do movie marathons all day.

But this year she's not there and it makes him ache for his little girl, who is not so little anymore. Who is growing up so fast he feels he misses days, weeks, months even just by going to sleep at night.

So today he bundles up on his own and decides to take a walk. He can take some pictures of the snow and show them to her when she gets back. Show her she was still here with him, even when she wasn't.

The air is cold when it his face once he gets out on the street, causing him to pull his coat and scarf tighter around him. The normally busy roads are currently scarily quiet. He lets his imagination wander, imagining post-apocalyptic times or zombie invasions causing the living to hide. Maybe he's one of the last humans left to fight the rise of the robots, taking over the earth.

He makes his way toward the park closest to his loft, still lost in thought, still missing the constant chatter of his daughter. The excitement she has even as a preteen. He pulls out his camera and snaps a few pictures; road signs dusted in snow, the empty streets with no sign of tire marks yet, then his feet sunken in the few inches.

As he enters the park, he sees it's empty except for a woman on one of the swings. She seems to be crying, and he wants to help, see if even for a moment he can cheer her up. So he makes his way toward her, making sure to make enough noise so he doesn't startle her but not sounding like an elephant marching her way.

"Excuse me," he says quietly and he dusts the snow off of the swing next to her and sits "mind if I sit here?"

"Oh yeah sure, I was just getting up to leave," she answers wiping the tears from her cheeks.

"Oh no I didn't mean to run you off. I just noticed you seemed upset and thought you might like some company."

"I'm fine, just remembering someone I lost a long time ago," she says sitting back down.

"I'm sorry for your loss. I'm here missing my daughter. She's spending some time with her mother on the west coast and won't be back until the 23rd. We always play in the first snow together, so I thought I'd come and at least enjoy the fresh, cold air even though she's not here with me." he tells her. Offering his memories and reasons to help make sure more comfortable. Show her he's not just a creep walking in a children's park in the early morning hours.

"My mom loved the first now too. She loved everything about the holidays. The lights, the colors, the generosity and excitement."

"So does Alexis, even at 12 she's so excited to decorate and put up stockings, pick a tree and hang out with her very uncool dad."

At that she laughs, she recognizes this man. Would know him anywhere after seeing his picture on the back of so many of her favorite novels.

"I'm Kate," she says holding out her hand to shake his. "And I don't think you're that uncool Mr Castle."

"Rick, please," he replies shaking her hand in return. "Oh, but you know me, are you a fan, Kate?" He smirks.

"Of the genre, yes"

"Well, I'm pretty sure I'm slowly freezing to an untimely death, would you be interested in grabbing a coffee? There's a coffee shop just around the corner. Unless you have to get to work that is or have other plans. I don't want to impose on your day."

The cold is starting to get to her now. Seeping into her bones through her coat, scarf and gloves and she shivers.

"I'm off today and sure, I've been out here for a while, a cup of coffee would be nice," she says as she stands up.

The two make their way out of the park, their steps falling in stride. "So, Kate, tell me, which of my books is your favorite?"

She barks out a laugh and replies "Let's get that coffee first then we can discuss books." A cup of coffee with her favorite author isn't how she planned to spend her morning, but she can't say it's a bad thing. After all, he too is associated with good memories of her mother, Johanna loved his books, just as much as Kate does.


End file.
